Top 6 Online Dating Tips For Guys Who Want To Secure A Date
Irrespective of how it’s portrayed, online dating can be difficult. For many love seekers hoping to find that perfect partner, navigating through the online dating maze isn’t as straightforward as traditional dating.
With an endless number of websites to hook up, standing out from the crowd is very important in scoring that dream date. According to Ryan Jakovljevic, an award-winning relationship expert and couple’s therapist, there is the need to “learn the do's and don'ts of online dating -- suited for the average straight man.”
Therefore, here are the top expert tips and tricks to keep in mind next time you find yourself swiping away.
1. Ensure you know exactly what you’re searching for
In the world of online dating, it is important to have a clear picture of the type of relationship you’re seeking, says Jakovljevic.
For some, a no-strings-attached rendezvous is all they desire, while for others, a casual date or a very serious relationship is the end goal. Whichever one it is, ensure to create a profile that accurately reflects your desired relationship.
2. Assume the position of the potential match
One of the most effective ways to up your online dating game is by trying to putyourself in theshoes of your prospective partner. For example, Jakovljevic suggests that to gain better insights into a woman's perspective, it is advisable to create a female dating profile for a day or two and pay close attention to the kind of conversations men hold with you.
"Most women are getting dozens of messages, only a few of which stand out. It can be a real eye-opener," said Jakovljevic.
3. Lesser words, more action
According to Jakovljevic, one of the top mistake’s guys make when dating online is writing exhaustively about their traits rather than demonstrating their traits. This is usually disadvantageous as there is a clear difference between writing“I'm a really hilarious dude,” and sharing a funny story on your profile.
"If someone tells you they're really cool, one thing you can be sure if is, they aren't," he advises.
Therefore, it is best to think deeply about what you intend to communicate to your prospective partner, and display that instead rather than just saying it. Another helpful tip would be to ask yourself, “What manner of introduction would attract me to keep on reading?”
“Steer clear of eliminating prospective dates, e.g. ‘must be down for a good time’ or ‘have to be adventurous before swiping right.’ The last thing you want is to come off as critical or bossy. Keep it positive,” Jakovljevic notes.
4. Your most preferred profile picture may not be the most appropriate
This may come as a surprise, but the worst photo you can post on your profile if you require the attention of women to is one of you smiling and looking at the camera, according to Jakovljevic. The best performing photos are the ones where the guy is not smiling and also looking away from the camera.
"Women love to see a man's sense of focus and intensity. Imagine a shot of you in action playing pool, focusing on making a shot," he said.
Therefore, for optimal results, upload a photograph of you in a social gathering and then another depicting you actively engaged in something interesting. The aim for the latter is to incite curiosity and create topics of conversation. For instance, a great example of a good photo is one showing you backstage with a band or in a remote area less traveled-to. Your prospective match begins to ponder on question like, “How did he pull that off?” or “How did he get a ticket to this show?”
5. Create a personalized greeting
Don’t opt for the generic “Hey, what's up?” greeting, rather chose to always send a personalized message. Investing time into crafting a unique greeting shows that you're genuinely interested and have spent time reading through her profile.
According to a study by dating site OKCupid, “messages that include the phrase ‘you mention’ along with an interest listed in her profile, or messages that suggest you have a common interest, have a much higher chance of getting a response.”
Additionally, when exchanging messages, it's important to avoid text-speaking and giving physical compliments, says Jakovljevic. Also, poor grammar and incorrect spelling are a big turn-off, that makes for an awful first impression.
6. Be open and avoid playing games
One rule Jakovjevic advises men to adhere to is: Don't play games. No one wins.
“If you don't like someone, be mature enough to tell them you aren't interested. If you're interested, don't try to be unavailable or hard to get,” he says. “If you're honest and straight up and it doesn't work, that's okay -- you're filtering out people who don't fit what you're looking for.”