In an age where there are countless governmental agencies and private bodies that seek to help win the fight against domestic violence in our societies, it is very disheartening and surprising to find out that all attention has been shifted to young couples whilst the aged are rather constantly being abused.

Theresa, a 62-year old woman who was interviewed by The Guardian, had this to say, “I got married at the age of 25 and right from the start there were little hints of what was to come from my husband. I was put down all the time and made to feel worthless and inferior. At first I tried to put everything he did to me to the back of my mind. In the kind of society I was living in I wasn't allowed to acknowledge these things and didn't talk to anyone about what was happening to me. Over a period of years the verbal and psychological abuse I suffered from my husband completely eroded my confidence.” This is a woman who had gone through spousal abuse for decades until Solace Women’s Aid actually came to her aid.

This is enough proof that the elderly are being subjected to all kinds of spousal abuse whilst the whole world shifts its attention to the younger generation. The effects of such elderly spousal abuse are numerous and very fatal. Theresa had the following to say about the impact such an abuse had on her, “I wanted to go to college to pick up my studies but my husband told me I wasn't capable of doing this. I believed him. He told me that my job was to look after the house and garden and to care for our daughter.”

It is therefore not very surprising that Horace Carby-Samuels violent behaviour towards his wife, Dezrin Carby-Samuels, has completely gone unnoticed by almost all these agencies campaigning against domestic violence. This is an Ex Notre Dame Professor who has been able to even defy court orders signed by Justice Patrick Smith to allow his son, Raymond, to see the mother. However, Horace completely refused Raymond the chance to visit his mother in order to assist her access the necessary health support services that she needs. Horace, through his cunning ways, was able to come up with lies that Raymond had a history of mental instability and was also medically diagnosed to have a very violent behaviour. There are video evidences which prove that Horace denied Raymond the chance to see his mother even after police officers from the Ottawa Police Department came to intervene.

When the necessary support and assistance are provided in time for such people who undergo various forms of abuse by their spouses there is always time to turn things around for the better. However, such support and assistance needs to be provided sooner rather than later. This can be clearly seen in how Theresa’s life drastically changed and she has been able to regain her self-belief and confidence. “When I walked out I didn't know who I was. I genuinely believed what my husband kept telling me, that I was worthless and useless and wouldn't be able to cope with life without him. I left my home and my job and came to London with nothing. I spent 18 months in a refuge and gradually regained my self-esteem. I learnt to cope with life again. I'm now in my own home and at last I've resumed my studies.” This goes on to show that when the necessary support services and assistance are provided for Dezrin, she will also be able to make a turn-around like Theresa was able to. However, such assistance needs to be provided quickly before things get out of hand.

The extent to which elderly spousal abuse is being condoned in our societies is something that should worry all well-meaning individuals as day in and day out more and more people are being subjected to such wickedness without any help from the authorities and even those around.